and add a dose of reality
by 309
Summary: A series of one -shots where all the countries behave like they really would. Based on random scenarios. Feel free to give me suggestions.
1. Door-to-door Salesman

**_Japan- "I trust everyone'_**

"So this Super Maxi Power Cutter 3000 will really work?" Eyes glistening with innocence and trust, he smiled and stretched his hands towards the glittering and no doubt tacky looking gadget.

"Hehe of course my good man." The shifty looking salesman rubbed his hands and chuckled with glee as he went on to continue talking about the wondrous things the Super Maxi Power Cutter 300 could do. About 99% of the claims were false, though .

"Ok then! I trust you!" without hesitation, Japan signed his name onto the contract The Salesman placed in front of him.

**(2 days later)**

"Noo! My Super Maxi Power Cutter 3000!don't die on me!"

Poor Japan.

* * *

><p><strong><em>England –' Never forget your manners'<em>**

"Hello, would you be interested in purchasing a Super Maxi Power Cutter 3000?"

"Sorry, no thank you." England smiled politely and attempted to close his door gently. The salesman wasn't one to give up and blocked door with his shoe. "Sir, ..." England smiled and pointed to behind then salesman "Oh my goodness! Is that?" As soon the salesman turned and moved his foot, England seized the chance.

He slammed the door then rushed to the window and pulled it open. "I'm sorry! Have a good day!" he yelled before slamming it shut and drawing all the curtains in his house closed.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Vietnam 'Why buy when you can make your own, for FREE?"<em>**

"Hello, would you like to purchase a Super Maxi Power Cutter 300?" The salesman grinned cheesily at her while waving his hands at the aforementioned item.

"..."Vietnam crosses her arms and stared at the Super Maxi Power Cutter 3000 with a look of curiosity and then distaste "NO! No way! Now please leave!" She stomped off towards her room and pouted slightly "..*sniffs* I couldn't afford it anyway...besides I still have my Cutter 1."

**(3 days later)**

"Vietnam? What are you trying to do?" Taiwan came over after hearing loud banging and exploding noises at Vietnam's home.

"C_hao _! I was building...this!" She gestured towards the carefully made Super maxi Power Cutter 3000 she had made from scrap metal and other junk parts. "amazing right?"

"..."Taiwan covered her mouth as she gasped "I did the exact same thing!"

* * *

><p><strong><em>America 'Stand your ground'<em>**

Narrowing his eyes as he went to grab the morning paper, he could see the grey figure of the salesman heading his way. Oh no you don't. Taking his trusty Ak-47 which had been handed down from his Momma, he headed out to confront the bastard.

"Whaddya think you're doing here? On my lawn?" America

"I'm warnin' ya buddy. One more step 'an you'll.."

The salesman didn't bother listening to the rest and headed up to the porch.

"BLAM"

"Phew, that outta learn ya." America blew dramatically on his shotgun and hefted it over his shoulder before whistling merrily to himself and slamming the door shut.

"Super Maxi Power Cutter 3000...my ass.."


	2. Bumping into strangers

**_Canada "..sorry.."_**

"Sorry."

For the 93430920th time that day and counting, he apologised profusely to the man who had bumped into him. "Err...sure." The man only looked at him with confusion before hurrying on his way.

"...sorry." Canada muttered to himself again and continued on his way.

* * *

><p><strong><em>India "..."<em>**

"..."India continued to stare at the man who felt uncomfortable and started breaking into a sweat.

"I'm sorry! It's my fault!"

"...No problem." India gave him a nod and continued walking his way, never breaking eye contact.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Vietnam "I'm SO gonna gossip about this to Taiwan!"<em>**

"Oof!" She managed to dodge the clumsy man by a hair and stood glaring at him.

"Uh...sorry miss!" The man tried to look sorry and looked at her expecting forgiveness.

"..."Vietnam gave him the cold shoulder and stalked off before whirling around and yelling "YOU SHOULD BE!"

* * *

><p><strong><em>North Korea "I'l beat you uppp! I really will!<em>**

"..I'll beat you up! I'll make you cry!" North Korea rubbed his pained arm and glared at the man with tears streaming down his face.

"..uh..I'm sorry." The man gulped uncomfortably and attempted to speed off.

"Next time I'll really beat you up!" Amid his tears, North Korea spluttered that empty threat and seethed in silence.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Poland "I look intimidating but I'm not."<em>**

"..." His tall imposing figure towered over the man who instantly broke into a nervous sweat.

"You.. bumped into me?" He spoke with gravity behind his words and a gaze that could melt ice.

The man who too terrified to speak and only nodded vigorously.

"Ahaha! That's ok!" With a broad smile, he gave the man a firm handshake and a clap on the shoulder "Everyone makes mistakes! "

* * *

><p><strong>readingpower:<strong> Thanks kindly! Haha, well I see alot of news on violent American policemen..sooo...*twirls thumbs*

**Awenia: **I thank you dear reader. I have a personal bias with Vietnam lol. A Super Maxi Power Cutter 3000 is the 3000th version of the simple vegetable cutter, only made with extra boosts like a turbo engine with 999 horsepower. Just something to scam our Hetalia peeps out of money.


	3. Eastern Drinking

"S-shut up! I'll beat you up! I really *hic* will!" North Korea slammed his glass down the table while sobbing and wiping his nose with the tissue China handed over. "*sob* Nobody except you cares! " He sniffled again and aimed a glare at America who could be seen in the other room laughing loudly with the others.

"Sorry Miss, China's already here." The bouncer crossed his arms and wagged his finger "We don't let in impersonators. Beat it miss."

"B-but! I'm Taiwan! I'm not trying to impersonate anyone!" Taiwan's eyes filled with tears as she bit her lip, trying to be strong. People were always saying she was trying to copy China.

"..atcho!" China let out a sneeze and took the tissue Japan offered. "It's ok.I have enough." Japan pulled out more tissue packets from his bag and offered them to North Korea who sniffled and took it grudgingly.

At a table in the back, Vietnam, Thailand, Laos, Cambodia and Indonesia (Cambodia refused to sit next to Vietnam) sat quietly sipping their drinks while aiming icy glares at China. Taiwan managed to sneak past the bouncer and joined the table, whispering with indignation at how she was refused entry. Vietnam glanced down at her dress which was a cheap knock-off of Singapore's and grit her teeth. South Korea patted her arm comfortingly but had to keep a straight face because of the double eyelid surgery he just had.

Singapore and Hong Kong sat to the side, dressed in fashionable clothing and swirling the expensive red wine in their perfectly polished glasses. " This party isn't too bad...for something China is involved in."

"Agreed."


End file.
